do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
