she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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