Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize