I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Bring me that man meat
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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