Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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