A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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