at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
