babies were throwing up all over the place
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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