My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
