So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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