he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
