I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
