where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
