It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
