We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize