i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
