she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
