All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
