Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
