what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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