You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
