i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
