i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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