actually, I'm a sock model
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
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