I think i peed on brittanys purse
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I have tasted many bathrooms
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