Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
