Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
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I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
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Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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