i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
is it fun? or sober?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
