yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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