Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Duck Duck Cougar?
my shit smells like andre
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
