i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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