i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
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