everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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