He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Vodka?
Forever.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
