Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
