8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
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