Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
