i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
