What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
