Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
