If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
