is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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