i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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