Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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