Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
