i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
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We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
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I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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