Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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