hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
