Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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