she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
