I saw his package. It spoke to me.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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